It’s been 4 months now since life as we knew it was put on hold or cancelled or modified – school, trips, sports, work. This family need a little something so we headed to the Cape for a night. We spent under two hours at the beach and friends, here is just a sampling of what I heard – The sand has too many rocks to build a sand castle! Are these sand fleas? Why is he watching TikTok right now? Why aren’t there any waves? When are we leaving?
There was a time where I would have fixating on those moments and seen the trip as a failure. Oh well, another trip failed. I knew it! This always happens.
But now, I’m in charge of what I see. And yes, I see the shit, but I also see the good. Wes jumping in the water. Christian and Charlie playing frisbee. I hear the joyful noises of other people’s children, muffled by the waves and wind. I feel the salt air as it heals, mind and body. There is so much to see, so much to feel. A lot of it is fleeting though, a lot of it so simple it’s easy to miss.
In an old life that feels distant but also feels like yesterday, the Noticer inside me was malfunctioning. It wasn’t letting me to see what was there all along. These little moments. Once I started noticing, I noticed more and more. The moments nourish. They stay with me. These little moments are my life’s foundation.
The other stuff (i.e. “shit”) starts to have less of a charge. Those moments start to fall away. They’ll likely always be there, but, they fall into the background.
There are times in your life when there’s a lot of the hard and frustrating. There’s a lot of pain. Now is likely one of those times. I want to tell you – work on your Noticer. Keep a look for those small moments. Soak them in. Practice doing that over and over again. Its muscle memory for your mind.
The little moments are where the connection and belonging and seeing each other happens. Thats the good stuff. That’s where life is. That’s what sustains us because it’s powerful enough to drown out the rest.
Oh and another thing – most of these moments don’t happen at those fancy places like the beach, they happen in the ordinary, regular old part of your life. Think grocery store and backyard and bathroom. And most of the time you don’t capture it in a photo, you just capture it in your mind. And really, that’s much better. Thats what you want because now that feeling is part of you. Your Noticer did it’s job. It saw all the love.