Right Now

Self help books, quotes, blog posts, personal essays, spiritual teachings – I love it all. I love learning, reading, listening and observing.

I’ve always been kind of confused.

“WTF is going on here?”

“What are we doing?”

“What am I doing?”

“Why?”

I’m always searching.

Last week I listened to Rob Bell’s audiobook “How To Be Here.” Have you ever read a book and say “Ohhhhhh.” or “Holy Crap!” or “Is he talking to me?” And then everything kind of comes together in your brain, like a 3D puzzle, with all the pieces clicking together at once. And you knew before, but now you really know? That was this book.

He was talking to me! It was a wake up call. It was all about being present in your life. What am I going to do so I can see what is here right now, in this moment?

This book pushed me to step back and look at my big picture.

I’ve been searching for my work, but it’s been right here in front of me the whole time. I’m a mom, a wife, a daughter, a friend. And now I will give those roles the respect they deserve, while I’m blessed to have the chance. Because they are, quite simply, enough.

So I’m not going to waste any more time. I’m going to use this blog differently. I will chronicle and share this journey back into my life, in real time. There are some things that need my attention.

And as always, thank you for reading.

A note about the photo accompanying this post: I felt so ridiculous trying to take a picture of myself using the timer on my phone camera. I finally gave up and went inside and hoped I’d captured something decent. Turns out I’d captured some magic.